Also: Bandwagon Pats Fans With Nothing To Do
Click Here to read my "expert" analysis of Super Bowl Commercials
The Super Bowl Halftime Show is like the Defense of the Dark Arts teacher at Hogwarts: There's a new one every year. They come with high hopes all around, and by the time next year rolls around, they're bringing in another doomed candidate to try to erase the distaste from the year before.
Don't get me wrong: I like the Stones. I liked McCartney. Okay, so I couldn't give a flying you-know-what about Janet Jackson and Danny Wood or whoever it was that year. But my point is, the Super Bowl halftime show is a complete disaster unbecoming an event the magnitude of a Super Bowl.
With the big-name rock acts, they only get, what, three songs? And they're old songs. Who cares about watching the Stones play three songs from the 60's - you can get a whole concert DVD, probably many of them. And it usually takes them a few songs to get warmed up - by the time the Stones got in gear it was time to go. With the exception of U2 in Super Bowl 36, they've been disasters, in my opinion.
But I know how to fix that.
First, bring back marching bands. Do the natural thing when things go all bad - go back to the roots. But don't get just any old marching band, get ones from the southern schools, like the FAMU Rattlers. When I was in Miami, we would book FAMU for football just to get the band down there. Our own band would get booed off the field, but the FAMU band was awesome. I'm talking about "Drumline" bands here.
Another idea brought me back to the old Mini One-On-One they had during Bruins games. Do they do that anymore? Anyway, have a couple of youth all-star teams face off. Maybe have them each start at the 20-yard lines, each side gets two possessions or something like that. I'm sure rules could be arranged so it would fit a halftime schedule, and they'd have the "Awwww" factor going on.
Hey, the ideas might be cheesy, but I think they're at least better than what they have now.
INTERMISSION: Dumb Super Bowl Comment
One of the ESPNers during the pregame show, talking about how the Super Bowl is different from other games, was trying to describe the spectacle including "they're gonna have jets flying overhead..."
Um...buddy? The games in a dome. If there are jets flying overhead. There are serious problems and its likely the game isn't going to be played.
Bandwagon Pats Fans With Nothing To Do Today
Actually, this is a media issue. I don't know anyone who actually said this, but the media makes it sound like we're all supposed to not know what to do with ourselves because we don't know what its like to not have the patriots in the Super Bowl. I kinda remember many of the previous 35 years when the Patriots were NOT a lock for the Super Bowl. Either these people are bandwagon fans or related to the Mr. Short-Term memory guy Tom Hanks played on Saturday Night Live. Just stupid, stupid media invention to try to stir up stuff, kinda like the Johnny Damon hate-fest they're currently trying to spin, but more on that later.